Measures of Faith

I don’t think anyone should be looked down upon for their life choices, perhaps their choices should be questioned, but nobody deserves to feel lesser because of what they do, who they are, or who they associate with.

6 Reasons why you making assumptions about another person’s faith is completely inappropriate:

1. Mr./Mrs. Perfect (circle one)- The allegiances, beliefs, loyalties, traditions, and convictions you have are not perfect for everyone else too.

2. Songs of Salami- Your "Biblical" assumptions left out that faith is given individually in measures (Romans 12:3) and that faith itself is a gift (1 Cor. 12:9).

3. The Santa Clause- You are not the giver of said gifts and therefore can’t really pontificate about them.

4. Life of Riley the Theologian- You have not achieved the full understanding of your own faith and should not have time to make observations of others.

5. EDD Check Yourself- Your conclusion that one’s sad state has to do with their lack of devotion to Jesus implies that you believe that every well to do person in this world is devoted to Jesus.

6. Act 2- CUT!- Your church where everyone believes together, has everything in common where there is constantly a sense of awe, and many wonders and signs are taking place doesn't exist yet.

Starving for Innuendo

Sweetness is best with a tinge of spice or salt.
Spice is best when it is deep and consistent.
Bland can alway be nudged subtly in to comfort.
Complicated needs only the simplest pairing.
Loud needs its own place.
Soft wants a little crisp.

The Things That Scare Us

Meeting in the night unexpectedly
Without any expectation speaking readily
Building toothpick fences for playing card houses

Meeting in the morning anxiously
Riding our lives to summit snowy peaks
Ignoring catastrophe while it speaks, speaks, speaks

Joining together day in and night
Learning all the tricks
Making paper airplanes from thorny drying sticks

Playing like children in the park, the pool, and surf
Feeding inner children with dinner and dessert
Memory strips like paper clips trampled in the dirt

The good times become worst
When perfect bubbles burst
These things that scare us
Surely aren't the first.

Besos fríos

The late summer heat
Could barely compete
With the love that we had

Oh sweet Summer's end
Too cold to pretend
A new sun will rise again

Once warmth and grace
Fall snowflakes of lace
Cold kisses all that I feel

No matter how much I miss
The warmth of your kiss
My heart, like yours, is as steel

Forever Swing

You poor thing
Living in pain
Twisting every ray of sun
In to cold ruthless rain

You tortured soul
Digging your hole
Tying each moment
With desperate control

That song you sing
While you swing
You took it all
You poor little thing

Reflections by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

On the surface of a swift-flowing stream the reflections of things near or far are always indistinct; even if the water is clear and has no foam, reflections in the constant stream of ripples, the restless kaleidoscope of water, are still uncertain, vague, incomprehensible.

Only when the water has flowed down river after river and reaches a broad, calm estuary or comes to rest in some backwater or a small, still lake- only then can we see in its mirrorlike smoothness every leaf of a tree on the bank, every wisp of a cloud, and the deep blue expanse of the sky.

It is the same with our lives. If so far we have been unable to see clearly or to reflect the eternal lineaments of truth, is it not because we too are still moving towards some end- because we are still alive?

Besitos y Abrazos

It was as if we disappeared when we kissed. When we danced we were the only ones at the party and the music was only the sound of our laughter. Each step we took was pure attraction like two magnets spinning pushing each other away and then pulling back. I could have sat on the well for hours. I forgot where I was and if it weren't for the applause I might still be there. How symbolic to kiss on a well- the source of pure water. How symbolic for friends to applaud our love before they understand it. There was something beaming from us that commanded applause. Something true. A pure spring of love in a world that is dry as the desert.

CALL OR TEXT ME ABOUT TONIGHT! LOVE YA!

Check out Jameson

Yet another wonderful discovery. Check out my most recent article on the beloved Jameson at CountryMusicPride.com

Then visit his MySpace and give him some love.

While you are at it check out Steve Carson Band, Billy Kernkamp, Barrett Johnson, Justin Grennan, Annie Bethancourt, and the man behind Billy's, Barrett's, Justin's, and Annie's beautiful sounds and recordings Dallas Kruse of Orange County's Zion Studios.

Orange County's Art Momentum is ready. Get in it now before it goes on the road!

Tie Them to the Anchor Man

Is anybody else sick of broadcast news?

I mean really sick. I was at the gym today and while I was listening to my music and warming up on the elliptical machine I was watching the news. Even with no sound I was so completely annoyed by the content. Body found, Michael Jackson's death, some other nondescript person murdered. This is the news.

Who cares about this stuff? Who pays for this nonsense? When did news become simply a morgue list from most tragic to least tragic? How can I find out what is going on in the EU? What is happening in Russia? Aren't we at war??

Besides, if someone I knew died, was murdered, etc would I really want their drivers license picture all over the television? The news is nothing but a glorification of tragedy and an expensive source for pointless information. I am glad it is dying a slow painful death to web-based information sources. I only hope this happens sooner then later.

Please respond with your favorite web-based information resources. Enlighten us all and save us from the stupidity that is broadcast news.

Stop, Collaborate, and Listen

I have been stopping myself from writing. Lately I have been on such a high from encouragement and love but I have been low on inspiration. I am a low maintenance guy. If it ain't broke don't fix it. Sometimes this translates to me if you don't feel like it blow it off. The inevitable conflict always arises when my dreams collide with working to obtain them. There is rarely a good feeling in work. Work is work. The only exception I have found to this in in those moments of writing where the fingers are moving without a thought and in music where the notes are being played but my mind is somewhere peaceful.

I had a thought a little while ago when I was speaking of art with my friend Del. The most beautiful things in this world are in one instant horrifying and in the same instant heavenly. Take the sunset for instance, our daily art show, a giant mass of exploding energy sending heat thousands of light years to sustain our life is simply orbiting out of sight leaving the beautiful oranges, reds, and blues for our enjoyment. I also like extraordinarily large waves. Reckless walls of wind-stirred water forced to the shallows in whites, blues, and greens pounding the floor with incredible force. When you can feel the waves hit the sand that is when you know what I am talking about.

Also, art is reproducing a subject in your unique way. Art is joining yourself to a subject and creating a reproduction. So, in a way, a balance must be maintained when you professionally create. A consistent maintenance of self and a sensitive awareness of what is outside of yourself.

I think I am due for a lube job.

Up On The Roof

I love my balcony.

Living in an up and coming Orange County city such as Santa Ana I live in such a great niche. There is a buzzing metropolis around me. The infamous Orange Crush, where the 5, 57, 55, and 22 freeways merge, and the new booming mall, Disneyland and surrounding area are crazy, but my little niche is just far enough away. I can see Disney's fireworks at 9:30pm nightly while kicking back in the cool August breeze off the ocean night after night. I get to watch the palms trees sway and my flowers grow.

I can reminisce on the old glories of the high-school days with my beautiful married roommates over a lovingly cooked dinner and wine as the moon shines. I can pray and reflect with a self-rolled cigarette in the still of the night without any interruption.

Sure, I can hear the neighbors sneeze and their children bustle about every once in a while, but right now I wouldn't have it any other way. I am very blessed.

For Some Country Lovin'

I was honored with the opportunity to contribute to a friends music webzine, Country Music Pride. If you fancy, you can check out my article here. This site is an incredible resource for everything country music related and beyond and the beyond is what I love about it.

Truly though, can the country be taken out of rock?

Jesus Freakin on a Theological Tuesday

Personally, there is nothing inside of me that agrees with the term Jesus Freak. The implications of such terminology as supported in the song, “Jesus Freak,” written by Toby McKeehan and Mark Heimermann was a quite popular song in the world when I was younger. It has never inspired me, until now.

The Southern Californian post Jesus-Culture church of the late 70’s in my opinion had a radicalized post-hippy extremist view of Jesus’ role in counter culture. Where terms like, “Real Men Love Jesus, His Pain Your Gain, and My Boss is a Jewish Carpenter,” came from. There were T-shirts, stickers, and a mass media explosion of terminologies, theologies, and cultural views of Jesus that were created in this time. I propose this is the reason why my generation hates Jesus and I don’t blame them.

This transition was hell-bent on teaching it’s ideals that, in my opinion, were angry, prideful, and thus silly. They worked to propel a movement that is now near extinction just like Muscle T’s and Mullets. Thank God.

People base their understanding of Christianity off of the only movement they have experienced. It makes sense. If all you know is the last 20 years of Christianity and you have tried reading the Bible in that context it is easy to spot a farce, a generally useless book, and an empty hopeless world without a God. Why would anyone embrace a world of holier then thou people and empty fear-filled followers that have divorced their God given personalities and passions to saturate their minds in half-assed theological study? I will quote my roommate Matt here, “God doesn’t need more lawyers to defend him; he needs more servants to serve him.” There is a place for apologetics but it is an expertise. Take Ravi Zacharias for an example he is one of the most brilliant men in the world. Check him out.

Then there are other people who I have experienced who continually obsess over the crimes of Christianity past. It seems there is some kind of validation or justification of hating modern Christianity based off of not only its current state but also the Crusades. The Crusades? Really? The Crusades? In my mind that is like hating France and the French for the Napoleonic Wars, hating Germany and Germans for WW1, and hating Rome, Italians, and Latin for Rome’s near domination of the ancient world. Securus Te Projice. ¡Por favor!

So as you can see there is nothing wrong with acknowledging that lovers of Jesus may be viewed as radical, uncultured, or even outcasts, but the glory is not there (obviously!!). There is no pride in being a freak. However, being faithful, joyful, loving, peaceful, patient, kind, good, and gentle is enough reason to believe isn’t it? I often wonder at the possibility of this reality. These are certainly triumphs and worthy victories for any human life.

What will people think if they hear I am a Jesus freak? That statement is a trap like: Does your mom know you are dumb? or Do your friends know you are stupid? It is time to move past these self-imposed cultural stereotypes and become a people who are honest with themselves and others in saying we are all human. There ain’t no disguising the truth.

Music Monday Success!

Today was my first Music Monday. This may require some explanation... This whole idea has been constantly on my mind to create activity days for myself so that I can spend each day of the week devoted in focus to one overarching theme, thus Mondays are now Music Mondays.

It started yesterday as I created a massive brainstorm session in which I isolated about 7 items that make me happy and proceeded to label each day of the week according to one of each interest. So instead of waking up in the morning and wanting to do all seven things at once and then blowing off everything to go to the beach I now have a semblance of structure.

Brainstorm Below:













So for music Monday I:
- Played bass for about an hour. Mostly some Wilco, a little Weezer, and a sad attempt at some Brubeck Jazz
- Ate breakfast burrito of my own making
- Went to Barnes & Noble and did some Music Magazine snooping
- Read the beginning of a book called A Musician's Guide to Reading and Writing Music while getting my car washed
- Went Shopping
- Went to the gym and listened to The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust by Bowie (CD of the day)
- Listened to a great podcast by Kris Vallotton
- Had a protein shake and a salad for dinner!
- Shared a bottle of wine with my roomies
- Played a little guitar

So over all it was an amazing day.

I know there are a couple non-music oriented activities on there... let me explain. Obviously I have to eat... and the breakfast burrito was exciting enough for me to mention. My Magazine snooping is considered research. Any real rockstar will tell you that it is important to have a clean car, and that going to the gym is a must. Take Usher as an example: He has a strict eating regimen, mandatory workout routine, private chefs, and STILL gets lipo on his stomach to pull off his look. Now I would be lying if I said I didn't want his abs, but truly I am not interested in that sort of lifestyle just to parade in my underwear in front of thousands of women every year.

The only six pack I want (if that is what it takes) is actually an 18 pack of my favorite new beer from Fresh and Easy!

It tastes like Corona but is 1/3 of the price. I love you Freezy.

Enough commercials already... I am happy with my Music Monday and am very much looking forward to see what Theological Tuesday will bring!

Reach for the Stars

I am in love with a dream...
and for someone who really loves being in love
I suppose there could be worse things.

Save The Cat

Save The Cat! The Last Book on Screenwriting You'll Ever Need by Blake Snyder

My review

rating: 4 of 5 stars
Oh Blake Snyder you are so snappy.



This book is a wonderful resource for any aspiring Screenwriter. I found it to be very useful as an overview of a few great process ideas and it had some good stories from Blake's personal experiences with writing that are very insightful. This book also happens to be entertaining enough and not so heady that you can enjoy learning screenwriting.



My only thing about this book is that it seems leaned towards the PG writers as it seems that is where Snyder has made his niche. So as a resource it is fantastic but to continue in specific directions far from PG movies you may want to continue your research elsewhere as a supplement.


View all my reviews.

Pig Latin

Today in the book I am finishing there is a chapter entitled 'Securus Te Projice" this is translated in the book, "Thrust yourself forward with confidence," and on further research it is a quote that St. Augustine used in his Confessions.

If I were the latin tattoo type this I may consider. It is just pure encouragement to me.

I thought briefly tonight as I stepped in to my elevator about the idea of 'take courage.' I wonder how many intangible things like courage, care, heed we can take by manner of our own will. Just as we would take food or drink we can choose to take courage as if there is a resource outside of ourself; a constant bounty of empowerment. I also suppose that there is an alternate source of disablement as well. Either way we take and through action we manifest the courage or the fear etc. We manifest the source.

Old Man

The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway

My review

rating: 4 of 5 stars
My first experience in Hemingway. I found it to be poetic and now I finally have the semblance of appreciation for this renown author that I should have had long ago. This book, in my opinion, is a metaphor for the frivolity of life. That we are all in our own way fishing for our one most amazing thing and through our troubles and toils even to the point of death we can indeed catch our dreams. However, despite our strengths, years of waiting, and even our successes our dreams will remain our accomplishments known greatest to only ourselves. However, the truth of our living accomplishments will also be known to those closest to us and will empower others to not only find success where we fell short but chase after bigger and better dreams.


View all my reviews.

I Love This Movie

I hate "health care." 

To me, there is no more devious menace to society then America's health care system and especially in California it is a complete black hole of human care and sanity. Everyone kind of knows how crappy the health care system is but if you have a job or parents that provide you have no idea how asinine it really is. 

For instance: Since I consider myself to be a somewhat responsible adult I made it a point to make sure that once my job's health benefits expired that I would get my own coverage. The fact is I never go to the doctor, but I am not up to being paranoid about random acts of catastrophe causing me to be in hellish debt the rest of my otherwise defunct life. So to ease my stress I get health coverage. I figure that at least caps the amount the man can take out of my pocket if the worst should happen. 

Of course Anthem Blue Cross has a website that is only partially functional. Annoying. Their paperwork totally makes sense to normal people who don't work for insurance underwriters. Not. Each benefit plan has fair terms and are made to accommodate all types of people in all types of health brackets. Health has nothing to do with health insurance. 

So I find a manageable plan with dental that is only $85/ month for basically nothing but emergency insurance and cheesy dental. Ridiculous. Then I get their response in the mail. Basically saying I have to pay a 20% higher premium $102/month because of tobacco use and my arm injury last September. Oh and the plan is way worse then the one I looked at originally everything is more expensive and I have a higher deductible.  

So a healthy 27 year old man with NO prior health issues, who is on NO medication gets hosed for over $100/mo. for "peace of mind?" The form doesn't even ask how much you smoke or how long... I could have smoked 1 cigarette in the last 6 months or 6 packs a day for the last 6 months, and I have to pay a higher premium because I USED my health insurance when I hurt my arm! Never have I experienced such a coldness and impersonality.

When I had a job paying for health insurance it was already intolerable and now I say it is not worth $100/month, but do I really have a choice? 

Yes. 

Bite me health coverage. I will take care of myself. If I fall again and break something I will load up on pain killers and take the next plane to Panama and get it fixed. Cheap vacation. If some clown bag runs me over and puts me in the hospital I will make him pay for it. If he is broke and has no insurance like me I will take it, but then I will file Bankruptcy and I will walk away with only injured credit. Who cares. 

I hope you die and rot away health care because you care for nothing more then the health of your bank accounts. 

Well...

So I had a smoke today, but I gave my pack away. I think I am less addicted to smoking then I am to quitting smoking. 

Passenger Side

I just had such an amazing experience. 

I was leaving Hollywood after seeing Star Trek (AMAZING!!) with some friends. It was midnight so I thought it prudent to go to the local 7-11 for a vitamin water and a pack of smokes. I left the 7-11 and lit my cigarette while driving down Sunset Blvd. all the while listening to Wilco's "A.M." The windows of my car were down as to avoid the unpleasant odor of a smoker's car and I was enjoying some of the last cool weather of Spring with the heater blasting. This continued as I got on the 101 South and all of a sudden it happened. 

While the wind howled thorough my car at 70MPH I was all of a sudden attentive to the fact that I was smoking. I realized I didn't really feel like smoking but I was doing so compulsively, and the conversation started. I was confronted by a voice in my own mind, while Wilco drowned in the rushing wind, that simply said, "What are you doing?" 

Immediately my brow furrowed as if I were an indignant child responding to a correcting parent. I responded, "I'm smoking." 

And then the deepest philosophical question followed by the concerned voice, "Why?"

I had no response since I was already aware I was being compulsive (AKA addiction.) I felt no shame or guilt but all the time my brow was angry and unmoving. The voice said with heartfelt concern, "You have to stop." 

Now, wanting to change the subject in my mind, I went to think about writing. The  voice said, "You will be a writer." My brow lifted, but the subject at hand was immediately brought back in to my minds eye while I sailed down the 5 South. 

The loving voice had parted and left a final thought: You will die. Not as a message of doom, but as a reminder of my mortality. My days on this Earth are numbered. I was instantly sobered and when I went to take another drag of my cigarette I realized that the wind had blown it out. 

I will remember that final thought because it came to me as if it was a man's dying words filled with desperate compassion.  I realized those were a man's dying words of desperate compassion. He died because he knew I would too and so that while I do live I have the opportunity to live fully if I so choose.

Father, into your hands I commend my Spirit. 

Contemporary Western Humanity

Steve Turner- quoted by Ravi Zacharias

Contemporary Western Humanity

We believe in Marx Freud and Darwin. We believe everything is OK as long as you don't hurt anyone- to best of your definition of hurt and to the best of your definition of knowledge. We believe in sex before, during, and after marriage. We believe in the therapy of sin. We believe that adultery is fun. We believe taboos are taboo. We believe that everything is getting better despite evidence to the contrary. The evidence must be investigated and you can prove anything with evidence. We believe there is something in horoscopes, UFOs, and bent spoons. Jesus was a good man just like Buddha, Mohammed, and ourselves. He was a good moral teacher although we think some of his good morals were really bad. We believe that all religions are basically the same (at least the ones that we read were.) They all believe in love and goodness they only differ on matters of creation, sin, heaven, hell, god, and salvation. We believe that after death comes the nothing because when you ask the dead what happens they say nothing. If death is not the end, if the dead have lied, then it is compulsory heaven for all excepting perhaps Hitler, Stalin, and Genghis Khan. We believe in Masters and Johnson, what's selected as average, what's average is normal, what's normal is good. We believe in total disarmament because we believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed. Americans should beat their guns in to tractors and the Russians would be sure to follow. We believe that man is essentially good its only his behavior that lets him down. This is the fault of society, society is the fault of conditions, and conditions are the fault of society. We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him and reality will adapt accordingly- the universe will readjust history will alter. We believe that there is no absolute truth excepting the truth that there is no absolute truth. We believe in the rejection of creeds and the flowering of individual thought. 

If chance be the father of all flesh disaster is his rainbow in the sky, and when you hear state of emergency, sniper kills 10, troops on rampage, youths go looting, bomb blasts school it is but the sound of man worshipping his maker. 

http://htod.cdncon.com/o2/rzimht/MP3/LMPT/LMPTCD125-2.mp3

Today's DC Memories

The World You Love- Jimmy Eat World

The perfect song for this trip. My iPod on shuffle always knows... always. 

Seven Caged Tigers- Stone Temple Pilots

Thinking, damn this is such a good jam as I waltzed in to the National Gallery.

Vicarious- Tool

While eating lunch in the National Gallery. Families chatting, kids, grandmas, and happy museum type atmosphere. While I was listening to this tasty number straight from the bowels of hell. Shaina would be proud. 

Ain't no Mountain High Enough- Michael McDonald version

After finishing lunch in the cafe at the National Gallery... Then I was interrupted twice for drinking water while on the moving sidewalk... I can have the water in my pocket but I can't drink it? 

Ballad of the Beaconsfield Miners- Foo Fighters

Snickering to myself that I knew who was playing this song despite the fact that it is an uncharacteristic Foo Fighters number. 

Gravity- John Mayer

Walking down the stretch of Cherry Blossomed road between the National gallery and the Capitol building. 

Bold as Love- Jimi Hendrix

As I looked up at our Capitol Building in awe.

My Girl- The Temptations

A Summer Song- Chad & Jeremy

Taking pictures of the outside of Union Station avoiding a homeless guy that was trying to bum a cigarette.

End of the Day- Beck

Gazing at the behemoth arches within Union Station half jealous that DC's is way cooler then LA's. 

Policy of Truth- Depeche Mode

After Leaving Union Station with a large Chocolate chip cookie and a bottled water. 

Slow Dancing in a Burning Room- John Mayer

After explaining to the cabby that I want to go to the place with the flame... the place by the Potomac? Where Kennedy is buried?? YES... Arlington Cemetery. 

Maria- Dave Brubeck

Heard the birds singing in between the breaks. 

Plateau- Nirvana

While taking a leak at Arlington Cemetery 

Lost?- Coldplay

Not a bad compliment to FDR's memorial. "Be sincere; be brief; be seated." FDR

Mr. Pleasant- The Kinks

An encouragement to accept the fact that it is OK to be rude to people, not listen to them, nor ask them about their lives... especially when they stand in front of you as you snap a picture.

Give it Away Now- Red Hot Chili Peppers

Not peaceful, but always brings a smile and air drumming while walking through torrents of tourists. 

The Wall- Kansas

The perfect neo-classical rock ballad to listen to while you approach something as neo-classical and rocking as Thomas Jefferson's memorial. 

I am the Highway- Audioslave

While walking toward the Washington Memorial with Jefferson to my left amidst hundreds of cherry blossomed trees.

Note to Self

In times like these many people who are kings and queens of their own world are bowing to the instability of the world we live in. Their kingdoms gone, their subjects are scattered, and their crowns are on display at the local Pawn Shop.

The true leaders in this new world will rise from the ash of the old facade of false security. The people who move with momentous energy, the people who don't settle for second, and the people who remain accountable for their responsibilities. Wise stewards and prudent decision makers.

So to all those responsible people out there. Your time has come. Do not say, "I have worked for nothing," there is no such thing, and do not give up. Revamp your financial plans. Shut off the news for a day and think about how you can adjust your lifestyle. Skip American Idol one night a week and give yourself TWO HOURS to judge your own life, to make your own plans, and to root for someone you love.

Hold on to what matters and to hell with the rest. Don't let one tree block you from playing in the forest.

You've got to get yourself together now. You're stuck in a moment... and you CAN get out of it. We will move beyond this moment.

After all it is simply a moment.

It feels like...

I am watching my life fall apart right before my eyes.

And I don't know how to stop the madness.