Area Man Finds Job Search More Difficult With Turkey Leg

Nov 27, 2012
The Onion Ripoff

Area Man, Richard Ryer, has discovered that seeking employment is only more difficult while trying to eat a cold Turkey leg.

"Normally I eat all kinds of things when I do my morning research, but with one hand completely occupied it is almost impossible to navigate. I can barely even get to the "etc." section on Craigslist without tiny pieces of turkey skin falling in to my keyboard!"

Ryer goes on to say,"Turkey legs are an American tradition, they should be enjoyed wherever and whenever one chooses. Whether you are unemployed, a minority, gay or all of the above nothing should hold you back. Perhaps Apple can figure this one out!"

The turkey leg is an American staple at outdoor events such as county fairs, Bar-be-q's and of course the big turkey day itself, Thanksgiving. Not traditionally an office snack or a sanitary choice for eating near electronics, but for one American it is clearly another stumbling block that will not  help with a job market that is confronted with new challenges every day.

"It just seems like everything gets more and more difficult. Today it is a turkey leg but next Thanksgiving I may not even have an extra one to snack on." 

Kim Conlan -The Indie Peddler

So I know it is kind of funny for one writer to write about another writer. There is that hint of bias, perhaps some unintentional criticisms, or a potential for missed communication. But is what my blog is all about anyway so I will do my best!

Kim Conlan AKA the Indie Peddler has been serving the OC Music scene for now several years. As a musician who has been in her circle of influence and a friend, I have been able to witness about two years of Kim Conlan- The Indie Peddler.

When I first noticed the Indie Peddler popping up around FaceBook as a self proclaimed writer of music admittedly I was skeptical. Artists, in my opinion, are never super keen of the rouge blogger with an agenda or the fledgling writer who can't stop saying how "bad" or how "badass" your art is.

Kim was neither of the two. As the Indie Peddler her writing style instantly captured me as poetic. The descriptions of events that I witnessed and participated in were reproduced in to text with a sort of magic and enthusiasm that I hadn't felt before.

Kim has her own perspective and is not afraid to share it. The best part is, it doesn't end there like it does with many people.  Conlan goes above and beyond to support the music she believes in. She is always around. 

Even more than that, she uses her writing ability and her artisan-ship to create books and tapes that promote her favorite local artists. For me, these are priceless keepsakes. Mementos from years of hard work and amazing adventures.

Special gifts like this, that require significant thought, patience, and devotion are extremely rare and should be celebrated. Kim Conlan, you humble Indie Peddler, thank you for all that you do. You are an irreplaceable piece of Southern California music and simply a joy to know.

The Indie Peddler will be releasing Volume II of her compendium of OC Musical moments this Saturday August 6th 10pm at Costa Mesa's La Cave Restaurant. Local acts: Charles Mansion, The Danvilles, and Stanley Lucas Revolution will be performing for free and copies of Vol II will be available for $5 each.

https://www.facebook.com/justin.deckert#!/event.php?eid=121359941287891

Unknown Sabbatical

After spending a time away I have just realized. Wow, I have not written in such a long time. Realizing this happens to me every once in a while I told myself out loud, I need to write. Shortly after saying that in my relaxed state I realized, no. I want to write. Writing has meant so much to me in this adult life of mine. Why would I take a break? Well... let me see.

There are so many good things I can think of that have actually hindered me from writing. In the past writing has been a way for me to connect with my thoughts and I have had the blessing to know people who actually care to comment and share in my thought life. My idea of a good time is having people react, relate, agree or disagree with my thoughts. Lately, however,  I haven't been involved in this public thought sharing mindset. My artistic expressions lately have morphed and social outlets have simply changed.

One shining example is the fact that I have an amazing woman in my life who I talk to for hours a day. My dreams,  concerns, thought, opinions and feelings have an immediate and supportive ear to rest on every single day. Marissa is my sound board, she is my partner, and someone who I believe in and trust. So naturally, the idea of tossing thoughts in to cyber-space have almost completely lost their subtle appeal.

Another great thing is that I recently moved. Well, in November. But still this has been a contributing factor in my delinquency. Now I live on my own in an amazing little place where I can hang my hat. It is a converted studio (AKA a garage) that has a full bath, kitchen, and living space. It can be a little cold without a heater but I have a great space heater and a nice wall AC for the summer. I love living on my own and, might I add, in such comfort and simplicity.

Thirdly, I have recently acquired an additional job. Both of my day jobs are completely computer-centric and I am sure any other office stiff like myself can understand.  Computer screens have little appeal after spending 10 or so hours a day plugging in words and numbers.

Billy Kernkamp is the final great thing that has taken me from writing. This band I joined over a year ago has been pleasantly playing consistently, recording, and networking since August of 2009. We recently had the pleasure to open for the legendary John Doe at Detroit bar in Costa Mesa and have a show lined up in February at the House of Blues in Anaheim, Ca.

So normally I would try to make myself feel bad for neglecting my "soul," my personal "art," and "passion." But this time I am not, my soul is in overdrive and my passion has increased and my art is becoming more and more of who I am and less of what I do.

The things I do and the people I love have been beautiful and  I can only pray that the palette I am mixing will continue to color this world the only way I know how.

So in retrospect it really hasn't been much of a sabbatical but more of an unknown surprise. Life has to surprise me, once the celebration leaves then what kind of life is that? You can spend a whole lifetime trying to avoid surprises or you can just enjoy the surprises. This is where I want to find myself and the people I love. In the middle of a constant life-long surprise party where everyone is always invited.

Passion to Perfection

Writing for me has typically been a habit that I have kept reserved for moments where I am most distracted. College was the real proof of this. Memories of writing paper after paper with headphones in my ears is mostly what I remember. There were several moments where I would have my laptop glowing in the grandstands of High School football games or on a School Bus somewhere in LA. Imagine, writing a theological exposition on the book of Genesis while there were 1,000 screaming people outside of the South American Jazz blaring in my headphones.

Typically I find myself doing most of my thinking to a soundtrack or some other external occupation. Naturally I am led to think of the few things in my life that force me in the moment to actually focus solely on the task at hand. Working on my VW is one of these things. I have had very few moments in which my meager mechanical skills were required for this task but when it is demanded the music is off and I am engrossed in the oil soaked beast that I love.

Surfing and Cycling are another sole focus or soul focus if you will. Music has no place out in the water or on the road. I find that when I am surfing or cycling I have a rare moment to be completely attentive to the task at hand. They are both relatively extreme sports and demands one's full attention.

Performing music is something of the same in my mind as well. There are so many options for distraction but performing music requires the ability to make the distractions inspirations. Sure, there are moments when the mind drifts and that dude gyrating in the front row triggers a lack of focus, but the best musical performances are nothing like that to me. The best musical performances for me are the ones that take you outside of yourself. All the technical aspects of moving your fingers and projecting your voice become natural extensions of yourself. Kind of like surfing in the dark. Once you are up it is nothing but instinct that moves your arms, your legs, and your voice. Instinct that you have created though years of practice mixed with a magic that only inspiration can bring.

Far too often the monotony of practicing so many different things that you love can be overwhelming. Devotion to any craft takes a certain level of passion and risk and so when I am spread thin there are moments where I have to rely on being distracted once again. Excellence will be demanded of all of us at some point or another whether it is at a concert, in the water with waves and people that demand excellence, or when writing a paper for a good grade.

Find yourself in the distractions you encounter. Limit them and consider them but when push comes to shove be sure to be around people who demand excellence, practice your passions, and enjoy the moments when practice makes perfect.

I constantly try to remember that practice never makes perfect. Never have I met a successful person who has accomplished everything entirely. Success is not stopping it is a continual climb from plateau to plateau.

Breathing is our most practiced activity. Everything else we work on will lead up to our last breath, which I believe will be the first breath of perfection.